I love the detail in Gus' life. I really feel for him, you know? Also, why am I not surprised that Jude comes from mafia roots? Of COURSE he does, the snot.
It follows my first novel but it’s a standalone story. There are some repeat characters, including Jude Pierucci, alluded to at the end of the chapter.
Following up on my Chapter 1 comments: if Gus works for the DA, he doesn't have "clients" and McDowell would be a "detective", not a "special agent" (typically FBI).
Also, if the narrator is not omniscient (it seems to be Gus-scient), it would be better to have McDowell introduce himself (by title and last name) rather than have him identified by the narrator.
I love the detail in Gus' life. I really feel for him, you know? Also, why am I not surprised that Jude comes from mafia roots? Of COURSE he does, the snot.
Sorry, who's Jude? Is this story is a sequel?
It follows my first novel but it’s a standalone story. There are some repeat characters, including Jude Pierucci, alluded to at the end of the chapter.
Following up on my Chapter 1 comments: if Gus works for the DA, he doesn't have "clients" and McDowell would be a "detective", not a "special agent" (typically FBI).
https://search.brave.com/search?q=are+state+or+municipal+detectives+called+special+agents&source=web&summary=1&conversation=08fbb4d693fa05e72b44a1dec9e38af83dc9
Also, if the narrator is not omniscient (it seems to be Gus-scient), it would be better to have McDowell introduce himself (by title and last name) rather than have him identified by the narrator.